Failure is the Line of Least Persistence

There likely will be setbacks and occasional self-doubts on the road to maximizing your charisma. You're going to need patience and persistence. But it's important to keep moving toward your goal.

I'm reminded of a friend who had a life-changing experience in a cross-country ski race in Minnesota. He had moved there not long before. In an enthusiastic, if not realistic, effort to adapt to the local culture, he bought some skis, practiced a bit, and entered an advanced competition. He took off like a flash at the sound of the starter's gun. But after the first quarter-mile in near-zero temperatures, he knew he was in over his head, hopelessly outclassed by other competitors swiftly gliding past him. He was soon alone in a frozen wilderness, and his thoughts turned gloomily to fatigue and defeat.

He had initially hoped to finish in a couple of hours. But as the cold seared his lungs and the exertion weakened his arms and legs, he all but gave up on his goal. If there had been a way to surrender, he would have. But being in deep snow in the middle of the woods, his only way out was to ski out. So he pushed aside the pain and pessimism, and kept skiing.

He imagined a lodge with a roaring fire that might be just around the bend-but wasn't. He imagined a rescue vehicle slicing through the drifts to pick him up-which didn't. He even imagined a helicopter dropping down to whisk him away-but, of course, that never materialized.

So on and on he skied until, at last, he came to a sign: FINISH LINE, 1/4 MILE. He couldn't believe it! Energized, he sprinted that last quarter mile and finished in a time not far from his original goal.

My friend often repeats that story, the winds more frigid and his muscles more aching with each retelling. It's become a part of his self-identity, and the memory of his endurance and ultimate triumph has gotten him through other of life's difficult scrapes and struggles. The moral, as he sees it, is that if you keep slogging ahead, refuse to give up, and stay as positive as you possibly can, you'll accomplish your goal, or something very close to it.

I could hardly argue with that. So even if you have trouble imagining success, keep moving along that snowy path in the woods. And before you know it, you'll have success beyond your imaginings.


Dr. Tony Alessandra helps companies build customers, relationships, and the bottom-line. Tony has a street-wise, college-smart perspective on business, having fought his way out of NYC to eventually realizing success as a graduate professor of marketing, entrepreneur, business author, and consultant. Dr. Alessandra earned his MBA from the University of Connecticut---and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University. He was inducted into the Speakers Hall of Fame in 1985

Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her.

She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed that, as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen.

She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire.

Soon the pots came to a boil.

In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans.

 She let them sit and boil, without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes, she turned off the burners.

She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me, what do you see?" "Carrots, eggs, and coffee," the young woman replied.

The mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.

The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"

 Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity - boiling water - but each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

 The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened!

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

 "Which are you?" the mother asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?"

Think of this: Which am I?

Am I the carrot that seems strong but, with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat?
Did I have a fluid spirit but, after a death, a breakup, or a financial hardship, does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavour. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.

When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?

Turning Adversity into Triumph

What was the most challenging period of your life? What was the hardest, most difficult time in your journey? 

Is it possible that this event was the best thing that ever happened to you? 

Watch Jack discuss this counter-intuitive idea that can help you turn adversity into triumph.



 

How to Increase Resilience in Order to Comeback From Life's Difficulties

Getting knocked down and then expecting to get back up can be difficult for many people. As we look into our ancestral past, we will see examples of many humans that had to deal with dangers that were real. They either handled it or simply died. In today's world, life has changed. We no longer have to deal with survival that threatens our life. And yet, our subconscious mind still thinks in those terms.

When we lose a job or some other difficulty, life may seem like it is over. If we are asked to perform at higher levels, we see that as a threat to our well-being. Not in what we have to do, but in being told what we have to do. And that makes things more difficult. So does the threat from a creditor. Heck, they might as well be some predator in the wild as far as our minds are concerned.

It certainly seems that today we are facing so many difficulties that really challenge us. How we handle them will determine where we go. Each of us has the ability to come back or to fold. It's not about what we have, but about what we believe and think.

The ones that have come back from any situation were always people of action. They had a determination and created a plan to see what they could do. These type of people existed all throughout history. They came from every socioeconomic group. And then they just did it. And so can you.

There are things that you can do that will enable you to deal with life's difficulties and make a strong comeback. Here are a few.  =>  http://bit.ly/xM6DN7

          

What you focus on is what you feel

It is easy to get yourself overloaded and overwhelmed when there is a lot happening in your life.

I'm sure you know this feeling - like there is a never ending list of things to get done in your life.

It can wear you down...if you let it.

...it all depends on what you focus on.

>>>read on.

What you focus on is what you feel

* When you focus on the negative aspects of other people, they tend to
bother you more often.

* When you focus on the negative aspects of your business/work, you tend to
feel more uptight, annoyed or stressed.

It is not that people, work or life bothers us. Rather, it is the
negative aspects of people, work or life that we focus on that tend to bother
us.

Becoming resilient to pressure is a choice. How fast you
bounce back from stress, pressure and burnout is a choice.
>
Question: So, how do you choose to be resilient?
> Answer:
By practicing gratitude

Read the whole article